It is unclear as to exactly when Enneagram personality typing came about. However, since the 1970s, it has gained popularity. Large corporations use Enneagram in their human resources departments for personnel placements or as a career guidance tool. Mental health care professionals may utilize this personality test to better understand their clients.
As a model of interlinked personality types, Enneagram focuses on the individual ability of people to improve and progress. This could also apply to relationships—both new and existing.
Many factors may influence Enneagram compatibility. PersonalityData compiled a generalized, unisex questionnaire-based study and established compatibility percentages. These are outlined in each section of the article.
The starting point to discovering your most promising Enneagram partner would be to take the Enneagram personality test.
Please be aware that, while we neither discriminate nor condone discriminating, against sexual preference, this article focuses on exploring heterosexual relationships.
Enneagram Matches by Gender
A study involving 457 couples established that applying the ‘best Enneagram matches’ to every individual, might not be entirely accurate. It is probably more precise to refer to the more commonly paired Enneagram types. This is also true for Enneagram matches by gender, where certain Enneagram combinations could form healthy relationships while others might not. Also, men and women do not choose the same personality types for their mates.
Attachment Styles and EnneaDyads in Enneagram Compatibility
This study by Kristin Arthur, Ph.D., and Katherine Allen, Ph.D.—Virginia Tech covers the attachment styles of individuals. These affect not only Enneagram couples, but Enneagram types in relationships across all spectrums, such as friendships. This study confirms that men and women choose partners differently. Furthermore, it establishes that this applies to compatibility too.
Another dissertation relating to marital satisfaction evaluates how attachment styles might affect Enneagram relationships. Also, EnneaDyads, in particular, could play a role in individuals with insecure attachment styles. One school of thought believes the major players of EnneaDyads could be the Allied and Integrative Categories.
- Allied, is when a woman is, for example, an Enneagram Type 1, and the man is the lower neighbor, i.e. Enneagram Type 9.
- Integrative is when a woman is, for example, Enneagram Type 1, and the man is along her disintegration line, i.e. Enneagram Type 4.
This information is detailed in our individual compatibility articles for each Enneagram personality type. For example, go to Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Ones to see all compatibility scores for Enneagram Type One.
Are Enneagram Pairings Important?
Certain Enneagram couples might easily connect. For those who need to better understand their partner, Enneagram embraces the ability of receptive individuals to grow within their type.
Integration and Disintegration in Enneagram Compatibility
It’s fairly common for males and females to choose partners along their integration (growth) and disintegration (stress) lines.
The Effect of Wings in Enneagram Compatibility
The wings of each individual will affect the overall Enneagram compatibility score. This will vary according to the strength and influence of the specific characteristics.
Enneagram Type 1 Compatibility in Relationships
In theory, Enneagram compatibility in Type 1 relationships should have an above-average success rate. This is because Ones have secure attachment styles. And it might be the case, even if their partner has an insecure attachment style. Please see the Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Ones articles below.
Type One males most commonly pair with type Five Females. They might share interests and enjoy the intellectual stimulation of discussions and debates while maintaining an air of mystery in withholding their deepest feelings.
Type One females are most likely to form partnerships with Type Two, Five, or Seven males. Twos may warm their worlds, Fives would be similar to the male-female pairing, and Sevens could teach Ones to lighten up and enjoy life.
According to PersonalityData, Ones may prefer Enneagram relationships as reported in the percentages indicated below:
Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Ones
Read about Enneagram matches for Ones:
Enneagram Type 2 Compatibility in Relationships
Since Twos have insecure attachment styles, Enneagram compatibility in Type 2 relationships, could depend on whether their partner has a secure attachment style. However, they might benefit if they have a highly influential One or Three wing. More details will be explained in the Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Twos articles.
Type Two males could be drawn to Type One and Type Four females. Twos may enjoy the stability that Ones provide, or the intimacy and mutual support in a relationship with Fours. Type Two females may seek Four, Six, and Eight males. With both Fours and Sixes, they’ll enjoy intimacy and support, while with Eights, they’ll be attracted to their strength as leaders.
A PersonalityData study outlines how Enneagram Type 2 relationships might prefer partners based on the percentages below:
Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Twos
Read about Enneagram matches for Twos:
Enneagram Type 3 Compatibility in Relationships
Like with Ones, Enneagram Type 3’s relationships should, theoretically, be mostly healthy due to their secure attachment styles. More information on this can be found in the Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Threes articles, listed below.
Type Three males might find Six and Nine females attractive. Threes and Sixes are both hard-working and Threes will value the responsible side of Sixes, while Nines would likely praise Threes for their accomplishments. Type Three females, on the other hand, could enjoy the company of Type One males. Both are disciplined and would probably be respectful toward each other.
As per PersonalityData, Enneagram Three relationships might experience Enneagram matches with the below compatibility percentages:
Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Threes
Read about Enneagram matches for Threes:
Enneagram Type 4 Compatibility in Relationships
The insecure attachment style of Fours could impact their compatibility with other types. A strong Three wing might lessen this effect, though. Alternatively, EnneaDyads could play a role. For full details, please see the Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Fours articles below.
Type Four males are probably most drawn to Type Eight females, since both are independent, passionate, and enjoy experiencing new things. Type Four females will likely engage with Type Two and Nine males. Type Two males could bring a sense of warm encouragement to female Fours, and Nines would provide Fours with an emotionally stable support structure.
Findings of PersonalityData established enjoyment of Enneagram Type 4 relationships with the percentages below:
Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Fours
Read about Enneagram matches for Fours:
Enneagram Type 5 Compatibility in Relationships
Since Fives have insecure attachment styles, a healthy partner for a Five is someone of a securely attached Enneagram Type. Alternatively, Enneagram Type Five best matches could be found in EnneaDyad linkings—as explained in Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Fives, below:
It appears that Type Five males and Type Five females may find their perfect partner in Ones as both enjoy intellectual challenges. Overall, their relationship is not highly emotional since neither will expose their deepest desires or secrets.
PersonalityData calculated the below percentages for Enneagram Type 5 relationships:
Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Fives
Read about Enneagram matches for Fives:
Enneagram Type 6 Compatibility in Relationships
The insecure attachment style of Sixes could affect their romantic relationships. EnneaDyads may present data about potential Enneagram matches. The Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Sixes articles below will supply more details.
Type Six males might enjoy a pairing with Two or Nine females. They’ll enjoy the warmth and loyalty that Two females bring, and the trustworthiness and certainty in Nine females. Type Six females, on the other hand, might form relationships with Three and Eight males. With Type Three males, Six females share a conscientious work ethic and deeply respect the energy and drive of Three males. In Eight males, Six females may find an ally, and they could share a strong personal connection.
PersonalityData presents data that shows percentages. This relates to the preference of personality types in Enneagram Type Six relationships:
Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Sixes
Read about Enneagram matches for Sixes:
Enneagram Type 7 Compatibility in Relationships
Enneagram Type Seven relationships present an insecure attachment style. For this reason, Sevens may benefit in a relationship with a securely attached Enneagram type. Otherwise, they might find partner suitability in their EnneaDyad. The list of articles under Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Sevens supplies more information.
Both Type Seven males and females may be drawn to a Type One partner. Their relationship might be highly collaborative and interdependent. The structure that Ones provide and the impulsiveness in Sevens may aid in the personal development of each other.
Sevens may prefer Enneagram Seven relationships, in accordance with data provided by PersonalityData, in the percentages below:
Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Sevens
Read about Enneagram matches for Sevens:
Enneagram Type 8 Compatibility in Relationships
Enneagram Type Eight could find happiness in a relationship with a securely attached partner. Or, since Eights have insecure attachments, they might refer to EnneaDyad to discover their Enneagram compatibility. About EnneaDyads, the Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Eights provides more information.
Type Eight males may be drawn to Type Two and Six females. The natural leader in Eight males will thrive on the support and encouragement of Two females. In Six females, Eight males will find a warm and committed advocate. Type Eight females could find happiness with Four and Nine males. Eight females could engage with the intuitive and risk-taking side of Four males, and they might find solace and an ardent supporter in a Nine male.
When it comes to love, Enneagram Type Eight might prefer partners in relation to the percentages below, according to PersonalityData:
Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Eights
Read about Enneagram matches for Eights:
Enneagram Type 9 Compatibility in Relationships
Enneagram compatibility in Type Nine relationships varies, depending on their dominant wing. If Nines have a dominant One wing, they’re considered as securely attached. However, if their dominant wing is Eight, they’re deemed to have an insecure attachment style. In this case, they may look at their EnneaDyad profile. More information is outlined in the Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Nines article list.
Type Nine males could enjoy a long relationship with an Eight female. Eight females can bring direction, confidence, energy, and drive to Nine males. Type Nine females may be drawn to Three and Six males. Three males could impart their drive, energy, and excitement to Nine females, and hard-working Six males will bring the much-desired loyalty to Nines.
According to PersonalityData, Nines may prefer Enneagram 9 relationships in the percentages below:
Detailed Enneagram Compatibility for Nines
Read about Enneagram matches for Nines:
A common theme in the exploration of Enneagram compatibility is the ceaseless need of humankind to question. And one of these is the desire to understand oneself in relation to others and their place in the world.
Compatibility between types can be used for any Enneagram in business, Enneagram in love and work, Enneagram friendships, or Enneagram relationship matches.
But an Enneagram is all about self-development. So, whether establishing the most common Enneagram pairings for an Enneagram dating profile or assessing the merit of potential friendships or work relationships, Enneagram is the perfect tool.
In existing relationships, Enneagram may guide individuals through their personal development, and thereby give these Enneagram couples a chance to succeed.
In establishing Enneagram compatibility within Enneagram relationships, a Walden university dissertation discussed their findings, taken from 324 couples. While men and women may choose their partners differently, they may also be compatible with dissimilar personalities. Also, attachment styles and EnneaDyads may play a part in the success of a relationship.
Before investigating your personal Enneagram compatibility, however, you would need to discover your Enneagram Type through the Enneagram Personality Test.