The Enneagram is widely implemented in many spheres of life. The human resources departments in large corporations find value in the Enneagram personality model when placing staff or assisting with career choices. Another application is in mental health care, allowing staff to better understand the personalities of their clients. Finally, many refer to the Enneagram system to check their compatibility with other types and what can they do to improve their relationships.
This article discusses the positives and negatives of Enneagram Type 5 compatibility with Type 5.
Type 5 Compatibility With Type 5
The wings of Fives may alter the overall result of Enneagram Type 5 compatibility with Type 5—including if they share a common wing or not. This is due to the fact that the diverse characteristics of their wing may filter into each individual at varying levels. The growth and stress phase of each individual may also impact their compatibility.
According to a Walden university dissertation that assessed the results from 324 couples, men and women chose the personalities of their partners differently. Additionally, they showed differing compatibilities with their partners.
Also, EnneaDyads and secure or insecure attachment styles may impact relationship compatibility.
With a 90% score, it may seem as if Enneagram Type 5 compatibility with Type 5 is among the best relationships. This may change when considering the characteristics of the double Five wings.
EnneaDyads, it seems, mainly impact relationships of insecure or mismatched attachment styles. Some believe on Allied and Integrative categories don’t have any effect. It’s possible, however, that success can be found in the following order:
- Woman is 5 and man is 4/Man is 5 and woman is 6
- Woman is 5 and man is 8/Man is 5 and woman is 7
- Woman is 5 and man is 7/Man is 5 and woman is 8
- Woman and man are both 5
- Woman is 5 and man is 6/Man is 5 and woman is 4
- Either the man or woman is 5 and their partner is 1, 2, 3, or 9
Anxiety and Avoidance in Attachment Styles
While most individuals with secure attachment styles find success in like relationships, mismatched (one secure and one insecure) attachment styles actually follow closely in terms of success. It’s possible, however, for couples to “earn” secure attachment styles if they have gone through growth or stress together.
Wings, Growth, and Stress
Neither Fours nor Sixes, the wings of Fives, have secure attachment styles. It is possible that this has a negative effect on Enneagram Type 5 compatibility with Type 5, though it is important to consider all factors.
The most significant of these is when they experience integration or disintegration (growth and stress), either individually or as a couple. This is due to the changes in personality during these times, when a different level of compatibility may form.
What Each Type Brings to the Relationship
If, as with Enneagram Type 5 compatibility with Type 5, like seeks like, this couple may share many traits, though their dominant wings will affect this.
Enneagram Type 5: The Investigator
Despite the tendency of Fives to appear detached, they may still hope for deep relationships. They’re organized and thorough, with an ability for protracted concentration. Having a hunger for knowledge, they’re innovative in problem-solving and may contemplate the world from an external viewpoint. However, they may lack confidence in their abilities.
They may dislike being pulled from their thoughts or having sudden changes or demands thrust upon them. They’re not overly concerned with how others perceive them and may prefer to go unnoticed. Non-controlling, they usually work independently and don’t involve themselves in the lives of others.
Fives are usually calm in temperament, don’t seek self-gratification, and may keep to themselves. They tend not to adapt to the expectations of others. They may also be of the mindset that every individual has the ability to help themselves and therefore doesn’t need theirs.
Enneagram Wing Contribution
Wings may alter Enneagram Type 5 compatibility with Type 5 since the characteristics of their dominant wings will join the mix.
Enneagram Type 5w4 and Type 5w6
Fives with a Four wing will probably experience a similar lack of confidence and sociability, paired with strong creative ability. They may feel out of place and succumb to occasional moodiness.
Four’s attachment style: insecure
When Six is the dominant wing of Fives, they may be more comfortable around people and exhibit a level of loyalty. However, 5w6 may need more reassurance and could fear rejection. Like core Fives, they’ll spend a great deal of time in contemplation.
Six’s attachment style: insecure
Positives of This Pairing
In Enneagram Type 5 compatibility with Type 5, the double Fives could have a truly solid and meaningful union. Their silent communication will satisfy them both on an intellectual level. They will enjoy knowing that they can read their partner’s body language signals, as well as understand that their partner can read them just as easily.
Fives will also probably leave their partners in silence to contemplate. This will probably give Fives an immense amount of comfort and sense of peace.
If they share an interest, however, this will probably be an area where they discuss their findings and calmly, perhaps even excitedly, debate the extensive possibilities surrounding this field.
Few issues surround Enneagram Type 5 compatibility with Type 5. And as non-communicative as they are content to be, this is the area that will most likely cause problems for the pair.
Lacking the need to have the involvement of their partner, as well as for being involved in their partner’s life, may seem mutually beneficial. However, it may result in each party doing their own thing, rather than sharing experiences. This will be especially true if they have different interests and hobbies. If this pattern continues, it could lead to the relationship having no value to either partner.
The double Fives in Enneagram Type 5 compatibility with Type 5 bring a surprising amount of interdependent harmony into their relationship. They will probably perform most exchanges with a silent understanding and the fulfillment of the other’s needs.
It is important that they notice when their partner is seeking help, as for the most part, Fives tend neither to accept nor offer assistance. On the odd occasion that they do, their partner needs to be attuned and attentive to this.
To discover your Enneagram type, complete the Enneagram Personality Test.