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Compatibility of Enneagram Type 4 with Type 8: Challenging Each Other To Achieve Love

Enneagram personality typing, as a model for analyzing personalities, has value when used within human resources departments of corporations for assisting with a career choice or with placing employees in certain divisions. Mental health care providers may also find use in Enneagram to isolate specific personality traits within a patient.

Since the focus of the Enneagram system, lies chiefly in the ability of individuals to develop within their personality type, it may benefit both personal and work-related relationships.

This article delves into Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8, along with attributes that make the relationship great and potential issues this couple may encounter.

Type 4 Compatibility With Type 8

Wings may affect alterations within the dominant Enneagram type of Fours and Eights. This could change Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8. Also, changes in personality during integration or disintegration may impact the overall relationship.

Secure, mismatched, and insecure styles may also influence Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8, as well as EnneaDyads. The results taken from 324 couples were analyzed in this Walden university dissertation.

Compatibility Score

Although several factors may alter the eventual score, the core types of Fours and Eights, in Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8, show initial compatibility of 43%.


Although EnneaDyads may not influence relationships of two secure attachment styles, mismatched and insecure attachment styles may benefit. This will either only be for Allied and Integrative categories, alternatively in the following category order:

  • Ally
    • Woman is 4 and man is 3/man is 4 and woman is 5
    • Woman is 8 and man is 7/man is 8 and woman is 9
  • Disintegrative
    • Woman is 4 and man is 1/man is 4 and woman is 2
    • Woman is 8 and man is 2/man is 8 and woman is 5
  • Integrative
    • Woman is 4 and man is 2/man is 4 and woman is 1
    • Woman is 8 and man is 5/man is 8 and woman is 2
  • Matching
    • Woman and man are both 4
    • Woman and man are both 8
  • Shadow
    • Woman is 4 and man is 5/man is 4 and woman is 3
    • Woman is 8 and man is 9/man is 8 and woman is 7
  • Non-related
    • Either the man or woman is 4 and their partner is 6,7,8,9
    • Either the man or woman is 8 and their partner is 1,3,4,6

Anxiety and Avoidance in Attachment Styles

When both partners show secure attachment styles, their relationship is said to have the greatest potential for success. However, ‘earned’ secure attachment styles may be formed when couples experience mutual growth or stress. Also, mismatched (one secure and one insecure) attachment styles are minimally less successful in their relationships.

In Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8, Fours have a high anxiety and low avoidance attachment style, and Eights, high anxiety and high avoidance.

Wings, Growth and Stress

Fours and Eights have wings of Threes, Fives, Sevens, and Nines. Of these, only Threes show a secure attachment style. However, this could positively affect Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8.

When couples experience integration or disintegration (growth and stress), the changes in their personalities may also affect the outcome of Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8.

What Each Type Brings to the Relationship

Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8 examines the harmony between the characteristics of Fours and Eights.

Enneagram Type 4: The Individualist

Fours are the innovators, creators, and artists of Enneagram. Under their one-of-a-kind, independent, and reserved natures, lie warm, generous, unguarded individuals. They appreciate other ideals and cultures, and sincerely care for the welfare of people, animals, and nature.

The sensitivity and lack of confidence in Fours usually mean they will leave power and successes in the hands of the leaders—perhaps even allowing others to take credit for Fours’ innovations.

Fours may work to their own standards and not those of others. They value their individualistic skills and fear fading into obscurity. This can sometimes find them feeling moody or anxious.

Enneagram Type 8: The Challenger

Powerful and confident, Eights have little respect for the beliefs and cultures of others. They’re also not likely to defer to the wishes of others. As inherent leaders, only their decisions count. And they fear being controlled by others.

However, when it comes to those within their circle, they’re extremely protective and generous. They easily, and independently, face challenges and gain a sense of self-gratification from the successful outcomes.

Enneagram Wing Contribution

In Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8, the wings of Fours and Eights may both influence the matching of the relationship.

Enneagram Type 4w3, Type 4w5, Type 8w7, and Type 8w9

Driven, confident, and motivated, a dominant Three wing will probably cause the rise of these characteristics in Fours. This Four may then be more driven to receive praise and recognition for their creative skills, while perhaps showing a minimized tendency to regress into moodiness.

Three’s attachment style: secure

With the influence of a dominant Five wing, Fours innovations may involve a level of deep introspection and discovery.

Five’s attachment style: insecure

Eights with a dominant Seven wing will still show a powerful air of confidence. However, they may be more experimental, hedonistic, and less confrontational.

Seven’s attachment style: insecure

When Eight’s dominant wing is Nine, these Eights will be gentler, less domineering, perhaps less confident, but more likable.

Nine’s attachment style: insecure

Positives of This Pairing

In Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8, the leader and organizer, being Eights, may see potential in the innovative skills of Fours. They could protect and nurture their Four partners, helping them to achieve their goals. Fours may enjoy leaning on their Eight partner’s strength. And Eights will thrive on the sense of power this affords them.

Also, the leader in Eights could enjoy flashing successes, whether their own or those of their ‘people’. Fours appreciate beauty and refinement in their environments, creations, and in themselves. Eights may see this presentation as an extension of their success. Although the praise may embarrass Fours, they may secretly enjoy the attention it earns them.

Potential Issues

The more Fours lean on Eights, the more power, and control they give to their Eight partners. Once Fours realize this, they may confront Eights. But, no matter how gently, Eights would aggressively dismiss Fours concerns and point out that Fours should appreciate their generous aid.

As sensitive types, this may cause Fours to feel guilty. And, independent in thought and authoritative in their own right, Fours could withdraw into introspective moodiness or anxiety. Always aware, Eights could see this as a temporary lapse.

However, since Eights are unlikely to leave this to chance, they may go all out to rectify the situation. This may be in the form of generous gifts or repeated praise, which may appease Fours. This cycle could go on for a long time, and together these aspects may reduce the relationship outcome of Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8.


Both Fours and Eights are emotional types, with Fours being more so. Fours are, however, not confrontational, whereas Eights take up every challenge and conflict, sometimes with a level of volatility.

This combination means no issue is left unresolved. So, while Fours and Eights may not be highly compatible, on some level they find safety in a relationship.

In Enneagram Type 4 compatibility with Type 8, this couple could benefit from using Enneagram for personal growth, and in so doing, would benefit their relationship.

To discover your Enneagram type, complete the Enneagram Personality Test.