The value of Enneagram personality typing lies in how the system explains individual characteristics and how they intersect and overlap. In relationships, many people use the Enneagram to assess whether their characteristics align with those of their partner or prospective partner, such as the couple we’ll focus on today – Enneagram Type 7 and Type 8.
We’ll go over both types individually and then, we’ll move on to the positives of the pairing, as well as potential issues they might face. Let’s begin!
Type 7 Compatibility With Type 8
The integration and disintegration state, as well as dominant wings, attachment styles, and EnneaDyads, can alter Enneagram Type 7 compatibility with Type 8.
The resulting data that a Walden university dissertation acquired from 324 couples, revealed that men and women choose personalities differently in partners. They present with dissimilar compatibility levels.
The score of 26% for Enneagram Type 7 compatibility with Type 8 is probably not conclusive when considering the many additional aspects involved.
Although EnneaDyads may not impact the viability of a relationship, it’s possible that Allied and Integrative categories may have some leverage. Alternatively, insecurely attached partners may show a convincing outcome in the following order
- Woman is 7 and man is 6/Man is 7 and woman is 8
- Woman is 8 and man is 7/Man is 8 and woman is 9
- Woman is 7 and man is 5/Man is 7 and woman is 1
- Woman is 8 and man is 2/Man is 8 and woman is 5
- Woman is 7 and man is 1/Man is 7 and woman is 5
- Woman is 8 and man is 5/Man is 8 and woman is 2
- Woman and man are both 7
- Woman and man are both 8
- Woman is 7 and man is 8/Man is 7 and woman is 6
- Woman is 8 and man is 9/Man is 8 and woman is 7
- Either the man or woman is 7 and their partner is 2, 3, 4, or 9
- Either the man or woman is 8 and their partner is 1, 3, 4, or 6
Anxiety and Avoidance in Attachment Styles
When partners have secure attachment styles, they’re most likely to succeed in their relationship. Or, they may “earn” secure attachments. This occurs during mutual hardships or growth.
Those that are mismatched have one secure and one insecure attachment style, and this type of relationship is almost as successful.
The dyadic effect becomes relevant when both partners have insecure attachment styles.
Wings, Growth, and Stress
Sevens have wings of Sixes and Eights, and Eights have wings of Sevens and Nines. This means that these types all present with insecure attachments, so the dyadic effect may take a greater role in Enneagram Type 7 compatibility with Type 8.
Also, during periods of growth and stress, individuals may assume aspects of their integration or disintegration personality. These alterations will probably also affect the score of this romantic pairing.
What Each Type Brings to the Relationship
Each Seven and Eight combination will impart unique aspects onto Enneagram Type 7 compatibility with Type 8.
Enneagram Type 7: The Enthusiast
Exuberant, light-hearted, and charming, Sevens thrive on creative experiences and exciting adaptations to their lives. Their occasional intemperance may stem from a need to escape the monotony of life.
Independent in thought and action, they’re unlikely to follow rules or social expectations. But they can easily spark excitement in others in recruiting supporters for their adventures.
Their apathy regarding the traditions, beliefs, or well-being of others, probably arises from their resistance to, or denial of, defeatism. Also, acknowledging this would mean commitment, and Sevens are particularly averse to obligations.
While they may not be the most reliable Enneagram types, they bring some cheer to an otherwise sometimes bland existence.
Enneagram Type 8: The Challenger
The unshakeable confidence of Eights makes them fearless leaders. They may make and break decisions without considering the consequences. Eights will often champion the underdogs—both those in their inner circle and beyond. In fact, they’re usually highly protective.
While Eights may not consider themselves power seekers, they may intrinsically take the reins in all events. They will probably insert themselves into all situations that they encounter. They are independent and driven to show a successful image to the world.
Because only their viewpoint is of consequence to them, they hold little value in the beliefs, customs, and traditions of others. They will probably stand up to every challenge and could become aggressive if the opposition doesn’t back down.
As an outlet, their inner rebel may break free, and this could lead them down a road of overindulgence, especially as they succumb to the exciting novelties of life.
Enneagram Wing Contribution
The dominant wings of Sevens and Eights will adjust the outcome of Enneagram Type 7 compatibility with Type 8.
Enneagram Type 7w6, Type 7w8, Type 8w7, and Type 8w9
Sevens with a dominant Six wing will most likely be a little less outgoing and perhaps more committed and loyal. Some skepticism may mingle with their normally unyielding optimism.
Six’s attachment style: insecure
Eight as a dominant Seven wing could see Sevens being less conflict-averse. They might also be more caring and protective of others.
Eight’s attachment style: insecure
Eights with a dominant Seven wing will be slightly different from Sevens with a dominant Eight wing. This is because the primary characteristics of Eights will prevail. This Eight may be a little less aggressive and controlling than normal.
Seven’s attachment style: insecure
A dominant Nine wing might soften Eights. Their domineering nature may be dampened, and they may be more autonomous in their decision-making.
Nine’s attachment style: insecure
Positives of This Pairing
Enneagram Type 7 compatibility with Type 8 may not rate highly, but Sevens and Eights have several complementary characteristics. This pair makes a highly energetic couple—Sevens in their vivacity and Eights in their expeditious resolve.
It’s very possible that Eights, who may find reprieve in excess and pleasure, could get swept along in the wake of frivolous and convincing Sevens. This could help Eights feel less of a need to control their Seven partners, and it’s an excellent platform on which to build their relationship.
Eights may exert their control and power on others in their lives, and so, gain the respect and compliance of these people. If Sevens witness this, they could grow to see the benefit of commitment and rational decision-making.
A few problems could affect Enneagram Type 7 compatibility with Type 8. These may come from the basic natures of Sevens and Eights. Sevens might find Eights negative and controlling, and Eights might find Sevens wayward and weak.
Sevens’ inability to commit could awaken the aggression in Eights—something that is already too close to the surface. This is because it may trigger the warning sensors in Eights who, at their core, fear being hurt.
Sevens dislike feeling caged in or impeded. If Eights attempt to dominate Sevens, Sevens may see this and will likely make for that escape hatch that they always keep open. Alternatively, if Sevens confront Eights, no matter how gently, Eights might aggressively shoot them down.
Also, as an independent and possibly self-centered duo, both Sevens and Eights will probably be unwilling to compromise.
The culmination of blending the positive and negative aspects of Enneagram Type 7 Compatibility with Type 8, may lie in the mutual adaptability of Sevens and Eights.
While so many qualities of Sevens may contrast with those of Eights, they have many similar or overlapping traits. While Eights fear being under the control of others, Sevens fear being stifled or locked into commitments.
In growth, Sevens could help Eights become less aggressive in their approach, and Eights might assist with Sevens’ commitment to their objectives.
If the couple employs the Enneagram to aid them in this personal development, Sevens and Eights could ascend to the best versions of themselves—this will benefit their relationship.
To discover your Enneagram type, complete the Enneagram Personality Test.