Enneagram personality typing is less about seeking your most compatible partner than it is about learning how to nurture and improve yourself within your existing relationships to achieve an overall, more harmonious partnership. It’s true that some personality types are naturally more compatible than others. One example of this is Enneagram Type 1 compatibility with Type 3.
However, the high level of their compatibility doesn’t mean that this relationship comes without any problems. In Enneagram Type 1 compatibility with Type 3, some may see the relationship as clinical, since both may focus on productivity.
Type 1 Compatibility With Type 3
Let’s take a look at the compatibility score and remind ourselves of wings and growth before moving on with this pair.
One study shows that, just behind the Enneagram One with One compatibility, at 92%, is Enneagram One with Three compatibility, at 87%.
Wings and Growth
As with all Enneagram types, it’s important to consider the wings—the numbers that sit at either side of the dominant number—stress, and growth in the overall character traits.
Anxiety and Avoidance
Both Ones and Threes show up in this study as low anxiety and low avoidance Enneagram types. Anxiety is low when Enneagram types have a good self-image and a positive view of their partner. Avoidance is low in Enneagram types who have a good self-image and view others positively.
What Each Type Brings to the Relationship
While Enneagram Type 1 compatibility with Type 3 is considered good, their wings will alter their personalities, so it’s wise to look at the person as a whole.
Enneagram Type 1: The Perfectionist
Enneagram Type 1s are moral and seek justice for all. They are structured to the point of being inflexible and self-disciplined. They fear making mistakes and so struggle to relax.
Sometimes, they can be bossy and condescending, however, they are probably more reproving of their own errors than of others’. Although they criticize themselves, they dislike it when others criticize them—they may express any resulting anger as sullenness or irritation.
As with all projects, Ones will probably give everything they’ve got to ensure the relationship is good. Their fear of failure means they will take their relationship and their partner seriously.
Enneagram Type 3: The Achiever
Enneagram Type 3 will bring optimism, confidence, and charm to this relationship. Since they need others to see them as successful, they will probably present themselves and their surroundings well. Their competitive spirit should carry over into their relationship, so they’ll thrive on others perceiving their relationship as successful.
Their energy, multitasking abilities, and high level of competence will filter into their relationships. This will probably also filter into things like organizing kids’ school activities and outings and making sure the couple has an amazing night out—on the odd occasion that they may choose to take time out.
For Threes, when things go wrong, they see it as a failure. Still, they are not likely to fall apart. Instead, they’ll adapt and strive to turn things around.
When considering Enneagram Type 1 compatibility with Type 3, it’s wise to remember that it is impossible to put everyone in just one of the 9 Enneagram boxes. So no Type 1 or Type 3 is purely that. They’re largely influenced by their wings. With Ones, they’re influenced by Enneagram Type 9 and Type 2. And with Threes, they’re influenced by Enneagram Type 2 and Type 4. Also, they usually lean toward their dominant wing, to varying degrees.
Enneagram Type 1w9
When a wing of Enneagram Type 9 is the major influence over Ones, they will retain most, if not all, of their Type 1 qualities. However, their Nine sway might soften their inflexible sense of responsibility into something more passive and laid back. Or, it might make them slightly less serious if the optimism of Nine creeps in. And perhaps they won’t need as much recognition for their successes.
Enneagram Type 1w2
If the primary wing of Enneagram Type 1 is Enneagram Type 2, their personality will be adjusted accordingly.
They will preserve most of their dominant nature of self-discipline, including a need for structure, to be morally good, to reprove themselves and others, to lean toward inflexible behavior, or in finding relaxation difficult.
However, some of the warmth of Enneagram Type 2 may filter in. Instead of assisting the world at large, they may be inclined to help individuals. Perhaps they’ll have a more developed sense of empathy and be more giving or generous.
Enneagram Type 3w2
Much like with Enneagram Type 1w2, when Two affects Enneagram Type 3, the high-achieving workaholic might show more warmth and be slightly less competitive. They could be warmer, more sincere, or more generous. Instead of leading teams, they might find they’re helpful, giving, and drawn to motivating individuals.
Enneagram Type 3w4
Threes are notoriously driven, consider love as a reward for their many successes, self-confident, high-achieving, and hard workers. When Enneagram Type 4 factors into their personality, then eccentricity, individualism, or intuition might guide them. They may be dreamier and more creative. These are wonderful qualities to add to Enneagram Type 3, as they may allow them to apply their innovative and intuitive abilities when striving toward their goals.
Positives of This Pairing
If you examine Enneagram Type 1 compatibility with Type 3, you’ll quickly establish that this is a positive union. Both dislike failing and are competent, hard-working, idealistic, and self-disciplined. They will encourage each other’s successes and even become excited by this.
Threes will motivate and champion Ones when they’re being over-critical of themselves.
Threes are goal-oriented, with multitasking abilities and a high level of competence. Ones are conscientious and committed to attaining perfect results. These qualities will probably appease the critics inside both Ones and Threes.
Although the outcome of Enneagram Type 1 compatibility with Type 3 will probably result in a good partnership, cracks may show if either becomes critical of the other. Even though both Ones and Threes are more than willing to dish out criticism, neither of them takes it very well.
Since Ones are already self-critical, they’re likely to take criticism personally and see it as a failure. Threes will probably see any criticism as unfounded and take it as a slight of their fastidious self-image.
Enneagram Type 1 compatibility with Type 3 may be notable in both their business and personal lives. Threes focus on their successes, they may have a tendency to cut corners to achieve an outcome that appears successful as quickly as possible. Ones may criticize this as they won’t see it as a perfect outcome.
Ones do the opposite. Since they fear failure, they may procrastinate to avoid making mistakes. Or their procrastination might stem from the need for a project to be perfect. Either way, Threes may see this as incompetence.
The resulting censure may lead to a One’s inner critic rising to the surface.
While Threes need public acknowledgment of their successes, Ones may be reserved in dispensing this praise.
Enneagram Type 1 compatibility with Type 3 rates as one of the more successful partnerships. However, from the outside, it may appear that this relationship is professional rather than romantic.
The pragmatism of Threes combined with the strict sense of duty and responsibility in Ones could make this a formidable couple in both a career and home life.
To discover your Enneagram type, complete the Enneagram Personality Test.